"If you're starting out as a younger band, take yourself seriously." Interview with Sour Widows

Revival of a Friend, the 2024 debut by Sour Widows, is a moody alt rock hinterland, an extravagant grunge palace assembled from simple pieces of the craft. What sets it apart? Touch. Texture. Co-produced, engineered, and mixed by Tiny Telephone’s Maryam Qudus, the album sounds pristine: each floor tom, snare, guitar string, and crying out voice given its space to breathe separately—and to organically meld into the whole. Traversing these sonic landscapes, one feels cradled by a warm, furious heart. Instead of cruelty or bitterness, there is a grounding gratitude strummed in love.

Ahead of Sour Widows’ headlining set at White Crate’s 4-Year Anniversary Party this Saturday, November 9th at El Rio, we sat down with the band to discuss Bay Area punk classics, how DJs are the true artists of the Bay, and more. Read on for the interview and get tickets to see Sour Widows at El Rio on Saturday.

When did each of you get involved in the local music scene?

Susanna: We got involved with the local music scene when we started the band. Maya and I have known each other since we were teenagers and we never lived in the same place. In 2017, we were both living in the Bay Area at the same time for the first time, and we were like, let’s start a band. Even though we grew up around the area, neither of us knew anyone in bands or had any connection to any local DIY scene at all. So all of our experiences with the local scene have been through Sour Widows.

How was your first show at Gilman?

Maia: I was so excited because I was a big fan of Green Day growing up. That’s one of the first bands that I got really, really obsessed with. So it was super legendary to get to play Gilman.

Did you grow up listening to Bay Area bands besides Green Day?

Susanna: Jawbreaker is one that comes to mind. Christopher Owens.

From the beginning of the band to now, how does the Bay Area influence the music?

Susanna: We’re honored to be a local band that hangs on here and doesn’t move to LA or that’s the typical trend. So it’s really tight when there’s other people who are serious who continue to choose to live here or at least split their time. Up until pretty recently, we were kind of outside of any scene. We know bands here because we all play, but we’re not really playing in any genre that the Bay’s well-known for. There’s a great metal scene here. There’s a great hardcore scene, EDM, the underground rave scene is really great.

Maia: No Bias – that’s the show I go to when I’m going out.

I think we saw you at the Bored Lord show at F8.

Maia: I’m sure.

Susanna: You did. I was definitely there. In that way, actually, I would say that’s probably the biggest influence for us of just a scene that we are not necessarily playing in, but we participate in and enjoy other kinds of music that people are making. And it’s really nice to be around people who are super vibrantly creative in that way, even if we’re not sharing bills together.

Maia: I don’t feel like we’re part of a scene. What’s inspiring to me about musicians living in the Bay Area are the people doing the underground DIY community driven stuff. And I would say they’re in more cut-and-dry genres than what we play. Because of that, they’re really, really powerful scenes, and especially the queer nightlife scene in San Francisco and Oakland, I feel so inspired by the ethos, even if it’s not the kind of music I make. DJs are the real musicians of the Bay Area.

The Bay Area is a notoriously expensive place to live, what keeps you making music here?

Susanna: Our families.

Maia: Community. Also, I am such a Bay Area California girl at heart. I went to school in the Midwest and I came to really enjoy it, but within a few months of moving home after I graduated, I was just like, 64 degrees is too cold. The Cali vibe is in my blood. I can’t escape it.

Susanna: The Bay Area is beautiful. It will always be home. We also live in a really beautiful house, and of course we have a ton of friends here. It’s also such a big part of our history as a band and also our plans for the future. If we’re doing well, we’re going to be gone a lot of the year anyway.

Maia: If we were to live elsewhere, it would be New York. I don’t foresee myself living in LA. It’s not really kin with my spirit, to be honest with you. One thing I love about the Bay Area is that it is kind of like a clout-less place, meaning there’s such a low ceiling of social climbing that you could possibly do here. People who are interested in social climbing in the Bay Area, it’s a confusing mentality to me. Like, where are you climbing to? We’re all just here to chill and do our art for art’s sake in a way. And part of that is because it’s so expensive. Anyone who’s sticking around and pursuing their craft in the Bay Area is freaking hardcore dedicated to the art, and that’s real and they ride for the band. Those are two very special qualities. But yeah, I do love how it’s not a very pretentious place. People who are pretentious here, I’m like, why? I don’t know who you’re trying to prove anything to. Move to a bigger city if that’s your vibe. And they usually do.

Susanna: You do it for the love of the music because it’s not easy to make here.

What do you think people could do better to support musicians in the Bay?

Maia: Thinking of White Crate or No Bias, or any kind of local collective or radio station that puts people on—you guys are the champions of the scene. Support is a top down type of situation, unfortunately, where because it’s so expensive here and a lot of spaces have been privatized and monopolized by large booking companies and basically tech people at the end of the day, it’s just hard to find spaces. Literally just spaces that we can book whatever kind of show we want at, or mix genres.

The most kind of success we’ve had has been at smaller venues, honestly, or even bars in the East Bay. Eli’s Mile High Club has done a lot for us as a band, and Thee Stork Club. But one thing that I think about is more all ages spaces that are actually populated and throw well-attended events because there are really, really few all-ages spaces in the Bay, especially since a lot of DIY spaces that were around when we started our band and before have shut down. All-ages events feel very important to keeping the music scene alive in the Bay and getting people involved.

Revival of a Friend is easily one of the best records out of the Bay this year. Now that bigger publications like Pitchfork and Consequence of Sound are giving you rave reviews, how has it felt getting all of this attention?

Susanna: It’s felt super affirming. It’s been really wonderful to see all the different things that people have written about the record and ways that it’s resonated. One of our favorite things about reading criticism or reviews is it offers you a perspective on your own work that you wouldn’t have had otherwise. We’ve been really lucky to have super thoughtful people write about our music. We feel very honored by that. These songs obviously are super personal to us and mean really specific things to each of us, and anytime that we get feedback from people that it means something to them as well, especially given the nature of the content of the music, it’s a life-affirming experience. It makes me really grateful when we get that kind of feedback.

Maia: Definitely. Yeah, it’s crazy. Every time we play a show and have people coming up to us and saying, “This is one of my favorite records of the year.” “This is one of my favorite songs.” Or seeing someone singing along. There’s the kind of industry side of the feedback, and there’s also just the attention of the audience, which always feels like people are really, really listening to our music when they come to our shows. I feel really lucky for that.

You recorded the album at Tiny Telephone, and Maryam Qudus produced, engineered and mixed it. What was it like working with her?

Maia: A dream? She’s great. We love Maryam. She is a great local musician. Her project Spacemoth is really, really fantastic. She’s also now playing in La Luz, which is so cool. She’s also just a fixture of Bay Area recording and engineering scene. I know she kind of got her early education and start at Women’s Audio Mission, which Susanna and I have both been involved with in the past. And that’s a really, really cool organization based in San Francisco that offers audio engineering and production experience and courses to trans people, women, lots of color from around the Bay Area. So that’s a really cool connection that we made with Maryam. Yeah, it was such an incredible experience getting to work with her on this album. I feel like she deeply respected the material, and it shows in how it sounds.

Do you have any new music we should be looking out for?

Maia: We’re writing a new album, and we’ll be recording it in January with another Bay Area native Melina Duterte, whose project is Jay Som. She lives in LA now, but she is recording, engineering, and going to be producing our next album, which is really exciting. And that’s actually a Bay Area artist that I was listening to when we started the band in 2017. Maybe it was the second album Everybody Works. That was on repeat for me when we started this band. So getting to work with her feels very full circle and exciting.

We have been playing a few new songs live as well, so if you’re at the White Crate 4 Year anniversary party at El Rio, you might hear some new music from us.

Does playing at El Rio have any significance to you?

Maia: Well, it’s a queer space gay bar, and I’m a bisexual trans person. I’ve hung out at El Rio plenty of times, especially around Pride weekend and stuff. We’ve never played there before. I’ve seen a lot of really cool events there in the past, so I’m really stoked to play a gay bar. That will be a really cool experience for us.

Are there any up and coming acts that you’re really excited about?

Maia: Spa, they’re super sick. I’ve never seen them live, but I’ve seen video and they’re doing some really cool shoegaze-influenced stuff. And then I mentioned some bands that are friend’s bands earlier. They’re all local based: Love Spiral, which is a really, really sick skrams band. And then Whine, which is a two-piece, super heavy. And Princess520, also extremely sick.

Do you have any hopes or predictions for the Bay Area music scene going forward?

Susanna: Persevere. Everyone who is working to continue to make shows happen and invest in new spaces or keep old spaces going, it’s just really important and it’s hard. It’s like everything is working against you here, especially on a structural level, not on a community level. It’s a tough place to survive as an artist. It really is. And it’s easy to get discouraged. We are not immune to that. It’s really, really hard to be a musician or to be someone who’s investing a lot of time and energy into fostering that. And there’s a lot of heartbreak all the time. And so yeah, love to play and play to love.

Maia: Love to play and play to love. If you’re starting out as a younger band, take yourself seriously. You can do a lot here and you can do a lot just by persevering and also being serious about what you’re doing.